In what some economists see as a troubling sign, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac invest $12.7 billion in Powerball tickets.

It’s hard to believe that 2008 is almost behind us.

Last year, while taking the hardest course I’ve taken at Temple University — Writing Humor — my assignment was to analyze a professional humor article. I chose Dave Barry’s year in review from 2007. And now I’m hooked.

In sports, the undefeated New England Patriots lose the Super Bowl to the New York Giants in a stunning upset that confounds the experts, not to mention Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, which had $38 billion on the Pats to win.

My favorite producer at CBS3, Teresa, shared via Facebook this year’s column by Barry, and now I share it with you. Sit back, drink some hot chocolate and enjoy.

On Wall Street, J.P. Morgan buys Bear Stearns; nobody really understands what this means, but it is clearly bad. Abroad, the dollar declines to the point where currency traders are using it solely for wiping up spills. Both Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac apply to be contestants on Deal Or No Deal.

And happy New Year’s.

Dave Barry’s Year in Review

I now have the pleasure of following up with this story.

Thanks to my obsession with cbs3.com, I found that our friend, Fr. Robert Whipkey, has been sentenced to five years’ probation.

He has to register as a sex offender. He’s no longer permitted to preach. And he’s having trouble looking for work.

All for running naked around a high school track in the early hours of the morning.

No reason has been given for the naked jog. I’m not so sure one is needed.

The title is meant to be sung to the tune of Dr. Elmo’s “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.”

I’m really only posting this story because I want to use my “Old People” tag.

A less-than-likely suspect was arrested for drug possession in Florida. The perp’s stats?

A 70-year-old Latina woman from Miami.

Apparently, she was purchasing it for her son. She denies her own use, but claims the officers were a little rough with her, citing a bruised wrist.

It’ll be interesting to see whether the judge empathizes. Only problem is, we’ll never hear from this case again because the interesting part is over…

Her big hit, “Momsense,” chronicles “what a mom would say in a 24-hour period” condensed to “two minutes and fifty-five seconds.”

But upon playing this for my mother, I discovered a new one. “Dadsense”? Yep. And it’s worth sharing. This woman seems like one sharp comic.

It’s so simple. So to-the-point. So…funny.

Sure, it’s probably cliche by now. But still…to actually see one? I almost forked over the $19.95 (plus tax).

There’s a holy battle happening in the eyes of motorists on I-95.

For months, a billboard read “Don’t believe in God? You’re not alone.”

Now, that’s been replaced with the one above. There is no attribution, no Web site, no company listed on this one. But the Inquirer got to the bottom of it (and it’s not the archdiocese, either).

Advertising is a funny business. And rebuttal advertising is a lot more fun, isn’t it?

Keep your eyes out. Next, you might be able to stick your hand out for holy water while driving by.

Photo courtesy of the Inquirer.

A woman in Texas had a comfortable life, working in a pizza joint. Until one night, that is, when she was held up. She handed all the money she had to the robber, who donned a wig and a mask.

After her coworkers beat the man to the ground, the woman got the surprise of her life — her father was the one holding her up.

But that’s not all. Police also arrested her mother and her husband for being in on the scheme.

Police say the worker had no connection to the crime, aside from handing the money over to her father…which she didn’t know at the time.

Makes you a little more grateful, doesn’t it?

I believe cbs3.com is one of those sites that succeeds. You know where to find information. Therefore, it’s easy to find a mistake.

The scenario is a Wisconsin who attempted to place a microwaved rat in her food at an upscale restaurant and blackmail the eatery for $500,000 in exchange for not going to the media. She failed.

And now, the accompanying photo. Cutlines/captions are fun, especially when misplaced…

If that’s Debbie Miller, then this makes for a cannibalistic rat, I suppose.

Don’t believe me? You probably shouldn’t, since I made that statistic up. After all, when you research something on Wikipedia, you take the same chance as believing anything I say.

But how often do you think to google Google? I mean, the search engine has become so ubiquitous nowadays that the lowercase ‘google’ was added to the dictionary as a generic term meaning “to search using a search engine.” Technically, I suppose, we can google something in Yahoo!

When you google Google, Google’s Wikipedia page is No. 10. Nos. 1 through 9 are Google products with the URLs [insert product].google.com. So, this constitutes one of the 1.7 times out of 10 that the Wikipedia page is no in the top five.

In essence, 1.45 times out of 10, Wikipedia is in the top 10. That means that .35 times, Wikipedia is not an answer. Pretty amazing, huh?

Follow the link to learn what you can learn.

But through Google’s wiki, I learned a lot. And I’d say 83 percent is credible, as the main entry had more than 100 sources with only a few lingering “citation needed”s.

I learned about the corporate history of Google, how the name is a play on words of the term googol, 10 to the 100th power.

I learned about the search engine of Google, the applications of Google, and Google’s Googleplex.

I learned about the art behind the Google logo and how Google is slowly taking over the world through this list of acquisitions and through Gmail (known as Google Mail in some countries).

And, I learned how Google tries to throw us for a loop with its myriad hoaxes and pranks.

I also learned they’re looking for an ad copywriter for their New York City offices. After all, Google has been named one of the top 100 places to work. I’m considering sending my resume.

So what does this all mean? Besides sacrificing your first- and second-born children to the behemoth that is Google, this empire isn’t going anywhere anytime soon. Before the year’s end, there will likely be many more Wikipedia pages on the Google applications, events and acquisitions.

Google is the way of the future. In a googol years, Google will still reign.

Apparently, rising prices aren’t just hitting the pockets of everyday Americans. Game show contestants must watch out, too.

This could be me. Last Tuesday, I auditioned to become a contestant on Wheel of Fortune. And according to this article from the well-respected Onion, I could be paying more for buying a vowel.

I survived the first cut of auditions. And now I’ll find out in about 2.5 weeks. Should I make it as a contestant, all expenses – airfare, lodging, etc. – are all on me. This vowel pinch might be worse than we all think.

So, really, the only reason I’m posting this is to talk up the Onion. It’s difficult to come up with story ideas without repeating old ones, and the Onion manages to do a pretty good job. And this is only one example.